Broken Promises
(c) August 16, 2011 All rights reserved
Silence and its deafening white noise swirls around her mind like a tornado causing her head to spin. She keeps promising herself in the end, she will win. But, hope is like a candle whose wick grows shorter through the passing of time. And, her flame has grown so small its fading color of soft blue reflects the hue of her mood.
So, she drops to her knees, lifts her head up, and prays for the silence to end. She prays for help in finding the key to her heart that she hid long ago fearing it may never mend. But, hiding behind fear had become a choke-hold and she realized that taking a risk may be the only antidote to renewing hope.
The walls of solitude were closing in. Darkness was becoming her friend, waiting for her to beg for it all to end. Ready to grant her wish quicker than unanswered prayers testing faith against will. So, she sits still straining to hear her faint heartbeat’s rhythm. It’s become the only sound reminding her she was still alive to survive the night, face another day, and once again fall on her knees and pray.
Her knees have become calloused and bruised. She wonders if God is amused. Confused by the lies whispering to her from the corners of silence she screams out loud. “I’ve vowed to be patient, I’m so tired. So much time has passed and my faith has expired. You promised to never deal more torment than one can handle, but I am about to be made an example by your broken promise.” And, this…this was the moment the flame went out.
Numb and alone, she felt a cold hand on her shoulder. Promising to hold her, comfort her, granting all her heart desires, if she promises her soul in return. It’s hard to say no when she feels there’s no soul left to burn. Hope has left her side and faith; no longer her guide. He whispers in her ear, “where is love now? I vow to never leave your side, not even in your sleep. I promise you’ll never again weep or feel weak. I’ll grant you power and fame and the worlds love will be at your feet.”
She awakens in a cold sweat. Was that a nightmare? Was that real? Her mind has been so cloudy and lost lately that her world has become surreal. She couldn’t remember saying yes, but she couldn’t remember saying no. She couldn’t remember what it felt like to be held or comforted in warmth; it had been so long ago. She felt herself missing the arms that wrapped her in comfort in her dreamlike state; although cold. Then she heard the voice out of nowhere again asking, “Yes or No”?
